Hello World!
Tough times don’t last, tough people do. – Robert Schuller
My name is Ciana ‘Ci’, and I am an alcoholic. I’ve struggled with addiction for most of my life. As a teenager I experimented with drugs and alcohol but was always able to stop using drugs without any significant withdrawals or impact. Alcohol on the other hand, was not so easy.
I’ve maintained sobriety in the past for long periods of time but always given in to ‘one drink’. For those of us suffering from addiction you know that one drink is too many, and one more is never enough. I wanted this time to be different, I needed this time to be different, because no matter how much I lied to myself and tried to lie to everyone else, I could see the effects in every aspect of my life.
So, I went to rehab! I started journaling as part of my daily routine in rehab. I kept thinking about something I heard there that really resonated with me. I watched a recording of Brene Brown who said, “One day you will tell your story of how you overcame what you went through, and it will be someone else’s survival guide.” I don’t know if this blog will become someone else’s survival guide or just my journal to reflect back on later, I will be stronger for it either way.
May you be sober and happy always! Ci
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Still Crazy, Still Growing
7.16.25 I tried to convince myself I didn’t need counseling anymore. I told myself that AA meetings, a solid relationship with my sponsor, step work, and fellowship with others in recovery would be enough. And while those things are incredibly important—and have kept me grounded in so many ways—they’re not the whole picture for me.
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A Skip in My Step
7.15.25 What a busy week already—and it’s only Tuesday! I don’t know what put the skip in my step, but today was a great day. Before the women’s meeting, I got to meet with my sponsor to finish my 10th and 11th Steps. We still have some reading left to do in the Big Book,
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Boredom and Balance in Sobriety
7.14.25 The topic in the meeting tonight was boredom and what to do when you’re bored to maintain your sobriety. I thought back over the last eight months, and I realized that in the beginning, everything was about routine. Just developing and sticking to a routine felt like survival. That structure was crucial to keeping
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Nervous, Hopeful, Ready
7.13.25 Should I have gone to a meeting today? Probably. Yes. The answer is always yes to that question. But today was full, and I can see that I still did things that support my recovery. It was a busy day—dropping the sheps off at the doggy spa, then coming home to deep-clean the house