Hello World!
Tough times don’t last, tough people do. – Robert Schuller
My name is Ciana ‘Ci’, and I am an alcoholic. I’ve struggled with addiction for most of my life. As a teenager I experimented with drugs and alcohol but was always able to stop using drugs without any significant withdrawals or impact. Alcohol on the other hand, was not so easy.
I’ve maintained sobriety in the past for long periods of time but always given in to ‘one drink’. For those of us suffering from addiction you know that one drink is too many, and one more is never enough. I wanted this time to be different, I needed this time to be different, because no matter how much I lied to myself and tried to lie to everyone else, I could see the effects in every aspect of my life.
So, I went to rehab! I started journaling as part of my daily routine in rehab. I kept thinking about something I heard there that really resonated with me. I watched a recording of Brene Brown who said, “One day you will tell your story of how you overcame what you went through, and it will be someone else’s survival guide.” I don’t know if this blog will become someone else’s survival guide or just my journal to reflect back on later, I will be stronger for it either way.
May you be sober and happy always! Ci
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Sober and Sane-ish on the 4th
7.4.25 I woke up knowing there was no water in the house again because of well issues. I braced myself for the battle ahead and prayed I could get through the day without completely losing my shit. To top it off, poor little Poppy puked on my comforter—something I couldn’t wash away right then. So
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Out Loud Recovery
7.3.25 I respect the anonymity of Alcoholics Anonymous and my fellow members. I would never do anything to jeopardize that for anyone else. But I decided while I was in rehab—shortly after I let go of the fear and shame of being there—that I am a proud and grateful recovering alcoholic. I want to shout
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Fireworks at Dawn
7.2.25 Just another great day to be sober. I woke up early, clear-headed, and immediately reminded that clarity also means I get to fully experience my irritation. The neighbors decided 7am was the perfect time for aerial firework practice. The dogs are losing their minds, and I’m trying not to join them. I caught myself
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Trapped in the Snow Globe: Learning to Move Anyway
7.1.25 My goal is to finish the 12 Steps by the end of the year. As I start the 9th Step at the beginning of July, I know I can accomplish this. There’s still a lot of work ahead, but I’m determined. I also know that the hard work doesn’t stop once I’m “done”—if anything,