12.23.24
When I raised my and in a meeting for my 24 hour and then again for my 30-day chips. I didn’t feel like I had made a huge accomplishment nor deserved the applause and congratulations from the group. It seemed like such a big fuss over something so insignificant. They were way too excited when they had been there for so much longer than me and overcome so much more.
Hearing “The first 90 days are the hardest’ now makes a lot more sense after completing half of it. The path we are traveling is not a serene flat dirt road lined with wildflowers and a calm stream in the distance. It’s straight up the side of a mountain covered in thorns and lined with temptation, while you’re barefoot. Everyday requires constant awareness and hard work. It’s not just about being stronger than the cravings, it’s about practicing new habits enough times that you can create a new, sober lifestyle.
I am proud of myself today because I feel like I have one solid foot on the ground, I am creating new healthy habits and not giving in to temptations. The people who told me how hard the first 90 days will be, are the same people who are still with their hands held out for help, their arms open for comfort, and their hearts open to listen to what I have to say when I need to. This is why I choose these people who have walked in my footsteps before me, and those who will walk in my footsteps after me, to be my higher power.
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