10.10.25
I love this time of year when the air turns brisk and the colors of fall make me smile. There’s something about the way the leaves change that reminds me life keeps moving — letting go, renewing, transforming. I find comfort in the little things that come with the season: slipping into warm, cozy clothes, wrapping my hands around a mug of hot coffee or tea, breathing in that crisp morning air. The list of things I love about fall goes on and on.
Tonight, I was especially grateful to be back at the alumni meeting after missing last week while visiting family. Walking into that familiar room felt like coming home. There’s something grounding about being surrounded by the “regulars” — the consistent fellow alumni who keep showing up, the staff from the facility who cared for us during some of our hardest days, and the new faces of residents who are just beginning this new way of life. I see the mix of fear and hope in their eyes, and I remember exactly what that felt like. It’s humbling and beautiful all at once.
My Higher Power willing, I will never have to be a resident there again. But going back each week — walking through those doors, sharing, listening, and reconnecting — is one of the best parts of my week. It keeps me close to where it all began. It reminds me not only how far I’ve come, but also how fragile it all can be if I stop doing the work.
It was such a short period of time in my life, yet one of the most impactful. That place saved me. More than that, it gave me the foundation to build a life worth living — one that’s rooted in honesty, accountability, and love. Without that place and those people, I wouldn’t be learning how to live differently today. I wouldn’t be making the kind of living amends that allow me to show up for the people I love most — not with words, but with actions.
Sometimes I still feel the weight of my past and the fear of slipping backward, but being there each week helps quiet that voice. It reminds me that recovery isn’t about forgetting who I was — it’s about remembering who I want to keep becoming.
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