Hello World!
Tough times don’t last, tough people do. – Robert Schuller
My name is Ciana ‘Ci’, and I am an alcoholic. I’ve struggled with addiction for most of my life. As a teenager I experimented with drugs and alcohol but was always able to stop using drugs without any significant withdrawals or impact. Alcohol on the other hand, was not so easy.
I’ve maintained sobriety in the past for long periods of time but always given in to ‘one drink’. For those of us suffering from addiction you know that one drink is too many, and one more is never enough. I wanted this time to be different, I needed this time to be different, because no matter how much I lied to myself and tried to lie to everyone else, I could see the effects in every aspect of my life.
So, I went to rehab! I started journaling as part of my daily routine in rehab. I kept thinking about something I heard there that really resonated with me. I watched a recording of Brene Brown who said, “One day you will tell your story of how you overcame what you went through, and it will be someone else’s survival guide.” I don’t know if this blog will become someone else’s survival guide or just my journal to reflect back on later, I will be stronger for it either way.
May you be sober and happy always! Ci
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I Choose To Be Sober
1.18.25 I fell asleep in my recliner last night searching for words to express the rambling thoughts going through my mind about this topic. I recently heard an individual share their perspective on choices. They were noticeably irritated and aggressive while speaking. I’m very uncomfortable when people display these behaviors and debated leaving the room.…
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Poison
1.17.25 “Imagine being bitten by a snake, and instead of focusing on healing from the poison, you chase the snake to understand why it bit you and to prove that you didn’t deserve it.” Whether I am sober or in active addiction life will go on. Good and bad things will continue to happen and…
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Prayer Swap
1.16.25 I love having friends to figure this new and new again stuff out with. My religious internal turmoil was never caused by God. I had a few experiences with organized religion that led me to make the decision to never be involved with it again. I’ll spare you the details, but a few give…
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The Real Game of Life
1.15.25 I went to a big book study tonight and we read Student Of Life. When she finally admitted to a co-worker she thought she was an alcoholic but avoided AA because she didn’t think she had hit bottom yet, her co-worker replied “You hit bottom when you stop digging” I felt like I was…