Hello World!
Tough times don’t last, tough people do. – Robert Schuller
My name is Ciana ‘Ci’, and I am an alcoholic. I’ve struggled with addiction for most of my life. As a teenager I experimented with drugs and alcohol but was always able to stop using drugs without any significant withdrawals or impact. Alcohol on the other hand, was not so easy.
I’ve maintained sobriety in the past for long periods of time but always given in to ‘one drink’. For those of us suffering from addiction you know that one drink is too many, and one more is never enough. I wanted this time to be different, I needed this time to be different, because no matter how much I lied to myself and tried to lie to everyone else, I could see the effects in every aspect of my life.
So, I went to rehab! I started journaling as part of my daily routine in rehab. I kept thinking about something I heard there that really resonated with me. I watched a recording of Brene Brown who said, “One day you will tell your story of how you overcame what you went through, and it will be someone else’s survival guide.” I don’t know if this blog will become someone else’s survival guide or just my journal to reflect back on later, I will be stronger for it either way.
May you be sober and happy always! Ci
-
Humble Pie With A Side Of Crow
5.9.25 Last night, I was listening to my book on the way to my birthday dinner at my sponsor’s house when the words hit me like a life brick to the face. I am obsessed with the need to feel loved and secure. It’s not that I want to please people, but I want people
-
Six Months!
5.8.25 How did I do it? H.O.W. Honesty, Open-mindedness, and Willingness is how I did it. Why? I did it because I had reached the point of no return. I was completely powerless over alcohol and my life was an unmanageable shitshow. Katy Perry had nothing on me. I have learned a lot about myself
-
Self-Understanding
5.6.25 This new self-understanding brought about a change in my responses to life’s situations. I realized I had the right to make choices in my life, and the inner dictatorship of habits slowly lost its grip. Read that again! I read it three times when I woke up this morning. This statement is so powerful
-
Cinco De Mayo
5.5.25 There have already been so many holidays in my sobriety. I guess that’s what happens when you go to rehab at the beginning of November. They still make me nervous, but I keep myself busy and my mind occupied to replace drunken memories, or even blackouts, with fun sober memories. Tonight, I had book