10.09.25
I look forward to our monthly dinners with my sponsor and sponsee sisters. We always have an informal meeting afterward, and tonight I found myself wondering why it’s so easy to share with these women, yet so hard to share at meetings. I feel like I should share more often, but when I do, I get so nervous that nothing I actually want to say comes out.
The purpose is to share our experience, strength, and hope to help each other — but if what I’m saying out loud makes absolutely zero fucking sense to me, how could it possibly help anyone else? Maybe it’s the comfort of my sponsor’s living room, or the small group of women I’ve gotten to know so well in sobriety that makes it easier. It feels like a genuine conversation instead of being on the spot.
It’s funny, because it’s easy for me to write knowing it will be posted on my blog for anyone who wants to read it — but that might be because I’m in the comfort of my own home, where I feel safe. There’s no pressure, no expectation, just honesty.
I think I’m going to ask Lady J for her insight — maybe she has some tricks to help me feel more comfortable sharing at meetings. Until then, it’s progress, not perfection.
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