6.28.25
Being sober doesn’t mean there aren’t shit days. Life still lifes me.
I have days when I don’t want to get out of bed. Days when my skin feels like it’s crawling because I can’t get out of my head or out of my own way. And sometimes it’s not even the whole day—just a stretch of hours that feel heavy for no reason at all.
Today started out good. I woke up in a good mood and met with my sponsor to finish step eight. I felt accomplished and ready to conquer the weekend. Nothing happened to change my mood, but when I got home it took all my energy not to just shut down.
I forced myself to go back out and meet a friend at the Magical Foot Spa, then ran a few errands. After that, I called it a day. I came home, curled up on the couch, shed a few tears, and cuddled Poppy.
A lot of people think sobriety means every day is supposed to feel grateful or happy. But it doesn’t. Sometimes sobriety just gives me the chance to be present and feel my feelings without picking up a drink or a drug. And that alone is everything.
Some days, winning the battle just means making it through the day sober. And that’s okay.
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