6.20.25
When I was deep in my addiction, submitting to a power greater than myself was effortless. It was alcohol. That drink had total control—it numbed everything, quieted the noise, gave me the illusion of peace. That first sip felt like liquid gold. It washed over me and took the edge off life. For a while, it worked. Or at least I thought it did.
But eventually, the same thing I turned to for relief started creating more problems than it solved. I wasn’t escaping anything anymore—I was sinking. That’s when the desperation started to creep in. I knew I had to find a different kind of higher power, something real, something not poured into a glass.
That shift wasn’t easy. Unlike alcohol, there were no instant results. No quick fixes. I had to sit with my feelings. I had to be honest. Open. Willing. I had to work—really work—for something better. There were times I doubted it. Times I wanted to go back to what was easy.
But today, I see it differently. The higher power I lean on now doesn’t numb me—it strengthens me. It doesn’t make the pain disappear, but it gives it purpose. The peace I feel now isn’t artificial. It’s earned. And it’s real.
I wouldn’t trade that for anything.
Leave a Reply