Hello World!

Tough times don’t last, tough people do. – Robert Schuller

My name is Ciana ‘Ci’, and I am an alcoholic. I’ve struggled with addiction for most of my life. As a teenager I experimented with drugs and alcohol but was always able to stop using drugs without any significant withdrawals or impact. Alcohol on the other hand, was not so easy.

I’ve maintained sobriety in the past for long periods of time but always given in to ‘one drink’. For those of us suffering from addiction you know that one drink is too many, and one more is never enough. I wanted this time to be different, I needed this time to be different, because no matter how much I lied to myself and tried to lie to everyone else, I could see the effects in every aspect of my life.

So, I went to rehab! I started journaling as part of my daily routine in rehab. I kept thinking about something I heard there that really resonated with me. I watched a recording of Brene Brown who said, “One day you will tell your story of how you overcame what you went through, and it will be someone else’s survival guide.” I don’t know if this blog will become someone else’s survival guide or just my journal to reflect back on later, I will be stronger for it either way.

May you be sober and happy always! Ci

  • Proud Mama

    2.16.25 My Daughter called while I was running errands and wanted to come over to hang out with me. She had a rough week and needed someone to talk to. As a mom, I want to take all of her pain away. I wish I could make it mine, but that is not how life…

    READ MORE

  • Flea Market Fun

    2.15.25 On the way to the Flea Market this morning we talked about how pleasantly different it was to be awake and productive early-ish on a weekend with plans. During active addiction, I might have made plans with the best intentions to go. This morning, I wouldn’t have had the energy to get out of…

    READ MORE

  • Judge Me For Today

    2.14.25 Self-love is a hot topic on this lovely Valentine’s Day. I think everyone struggles with self-love at times regardless of whether or not they suffer from addiction. Addiction adds an extra layer to the level of self-loathing in the mix. Sometimes it’s just fucking hard to look in a mirror and love the person…

    READ MORE

  • Smiles Are Free

    2.13.25 I like making people smile. It makes me smile too and genuinely happy. I handed out Valentine’s Day cards and suckers at work today. I know it’s a day early but wasn’t sure who would be able to make it in tomorrow with all the snow we got today and are supposed to be…

    READ MORE